Let's face it, we all lie to ourselves. It's become second nature and most of the time we don't even realize we're doing it. Self deception is not an innate human trait. It is a learned, trained, and refined trait. The lies we tell ourselves begin creeping in as our egos develop and we attempt to align ourselves with our perceived view of the world. Our circumstances and the feedback we receive affect our perception which in turn work with our internal processing to form our identities, goals, roles, and our "place" in society. Without society the ego has no function. In a quasi-protection maneuver it's our egos that orchestrate the lies about us that we often believe.
How can you tell when you're lying to yourself? It's simple. Ask yourself why repeatedly. I asked myself why I am writing this article. My immediate answer was, "To help others live with more internal peace". This is the lie I told myself. Without any introspection, I would happily proceed writing this article with altruistic pride. However, when I asked myself again, taking a moment to really think about it, I realized that I'm trying to write more frequently to publish more blog articles to increase my website's SEO. My bullshit meter went into the red. It is true that I want to help others liberate themselves. I'm hoping this article helps someone do just that, but the motivation behind completing this article is not as altruistic as I led myself to believe, and that's ok. Something has to motivate us to get things done.
You may ask, "What's the harm in self-deception as a motivator?" I think a better question is, "What's the benefit of being honest with yourself?". There are many benefits to learning to be honest with yourself. The process of introspection that is required to peel away the falsehoods you tell yourself is an extremely valuable process. It's through this process that you can learn about the drivers of your behaviors and reactions. Understanding these drivers is the beginning of changing how you perceive the world and your perception of the world creates your reality. You will begin to be able to create the reality you desire.
Sharing openly the truth that hides beneath your self deceit helps others recognize similar behaviors in themselves which they may not have been aware of. This fosters a sense of comradely and moves people away from feelings of isolation. It has the added side-effect of instilling trust in others.
The more honest you are with yourself, the more you can align yourself with your true identity and nature. The more aligned you are with your true identity, the more authentic you are. Authenticity is easily recognizable and highly appreciated. Who likes fake people outside of watching their train wrecks on reality TV? Authenticity and honesty foster trust and deeper, more meaningful relationships which can lead to a sense of fulfillment.
Learning to be honest with yourself can reap many benefits to you and to all those you interact with. To quote the Ancient Greek philosophers, "know thyself". True liberation is found within, so keep searching for it until you find it. Did you enjoy this article? Ask yourself why. Keep asking yourself why.
